evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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