I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize