I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
