I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize