i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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