Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
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