they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize