you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
