Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Are we still banned from the library?
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize