So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
