she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I want to be your penis for a week.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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