Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize