yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
