Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize