i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
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