apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
My breasts were aching with rage.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
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