Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
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