im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
My liver just had a heart attack.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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