If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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