Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
