We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Dear god my vagina.
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