so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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