I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
