Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
