writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
There r osticjed everywhere
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
