Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
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