You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize