no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
