I'm pants shitting drunk right now
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Your dad touched me again.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
