Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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