I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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