Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
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