her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
