I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Randomize
