We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
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