Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
it's great music for shaving your balls
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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