Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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