Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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