Is it normal to miss your booty call?
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
people are starting to question the shark bite story
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Randomize
