This girl is more easily done than said...
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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