Got a toothbrush?
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
