Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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