Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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