oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize