You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize