OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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