I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
