State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Operation Purity has been aborted
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
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