you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
