More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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