I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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